If Mommy is in the process of losing her hair or is feeling sick after chemotherapy, for example, talk to him about what his mother is going through and address the child’s fears or concerns. Validate his thoughts and then steer his outlook to one of hope.

It’s important to make your child feel supported by assuring him there are people outside of his immediate family who are there for him as well. Ensure friends, relatives and teachers are aware of the situation and show empathy, especially if a child acts out or demonstrates anger during this difficult time. There are also organizations, such as Chai Lifeline, that offer free counselling and family support programs, providing another channel for the child to express himself.

Quality time helps. Without a doubt, the day-to-day life of any child with a seriously sick family member will be affected, due to changing routines and household responsibilities, and everyone’s attention disproportionately turned to the ill person. During this time, as difficult as it may be to schedule it in, it’s critical to spend time with your child in a positive way.

Each week, choose a favourite activity to share — whether skating, going to a movie or even baking together at home — in order to maintain a sense of normalcy and create happy moments in the midst of the uncertainty. Give the child a boost, while simultaneously giving yourself respite, by taking advantage of the range of free support services offered by various organizations, such as after-school activities, Big Brother-Big Sister initiatives, family events and trips for kids with sick family members. 

Not only will these programs help lift the child’s spirits, but they will also enable him to forge bonds with caring non-family members and other kids in similar situations, creating a welcome diversion and lifelong memories.

Mordechai Rothman is the executive director of Chai Lifeline Canada, a charity that helps support families of children who suffer from life-threatening or lifelong illnesses. The organization provides dozens of free initiatives to help give children stability and their families a sense of normalcy, including counselling, tutoring for children missing extended periods of school, family retreats, sibling programs similar to that of “Big Brother, Big Sister”